PENGUIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[c=12]♥Jqi loves her piano..♥[/c] says:

if oni a few den can mention my name gua

warning warning beware of gigantic penguin in smkbbsp!!!

PENGUINJA

Penguinja, or ninja penguins, as they are more commonly known, are some of the most secretive and stealthy ninjas in existence. Some people claim that they don't exist, but that is only because ninja penguins are so good at hiding. Some people believe that Jacqueline creates the martial art called PENGUINJA!!!!

Wearing hoods to disguise their penguin appearance, they infiltrate your home while you're out and take up residence in your refrigerator, behind all the moldy leftovers that you're never going to eat. The next time you open your refrigerator, they leap out from behind the Tupperware and kill you using their secret Mad Ninja Skillz techniques. No one knows why they do this. Do they want something belonging to their victim? Are they assassins, hired by an enemy of the victim? Do they simply enjoy killing? Are they on a mission to eliminate people who don't clean out their refrigerators? It is a mystery which, sadly, shall probably remain forever unsolved, since most people who have seen a ninja penguin have not lived to tell the tale.

Beware, penguinja target disbelievers.
The best ways to prevent a Ninja Penguin from killing you are the following:
-Leave an offering of fresh fish with marshmallows on your doorstep.
-Never leave your house.
-Clean out your refrigerator frequently, or, just don't own a refrigerator.
-Buy or build a giant robot with which to defend yourself.
-Throw disks of various Linux distros at it as a distraction.
-Dump water on it or it will spit Acid out it's mouth!

-Put a C4 in your refrigerator

-Put a shark in your refrigerator so that it can eat up the penguinja

However, none of these are foolproof, and many of these things have proved not to be an obstacle in the face of the penguinja's Mad Ninja Skillz.
Additionally, there's some sort of rubbish mulling about that penguinja aren't mammals. This is an obvious attempt to exclude them from the ranks of ninja by the Warlocks, their primary rivals. The Walocks promote the idea that penguinjas are actually flightless birds. Penguinjas are not birds although they can fly.

EARLY PENGUIN ARMIES OF DOOM!!!

The first Penguin Army of Doom was established in Sri Petaling, Kuala Lumpur in 1993A.D., and was led by General Happy Feet JACQUELINE. General JACQUELINE was a trilingual, speaking Penguinish, and Latin. At first, the small army suffered the pain of deprivation. Soon, Colonel Penggus kahyan =X (a rather uneducated penguin who spoke only broken Penguinish) came up with the brilliant idea of advertising, and posted these campaign posters all throughout Sri Petaling. Unfortunately, these signs were soon retired because the words "of doom" had been extracted, and too many non-evil penguins were enlisting. this resulted in the death of many inocent dolphins, the arch-enemy of most non-evil penguins. dolphins were hunted down, and slaying before the eyes of the family, just to be shot to the moon. One simply can not imagine the horrible pain the dolphins must have been in, whilst there guts where leaving the body, in ways they where not ment to. It must have been horrible, HORRIBLE! And if a dolphin loving person would read this he would most certainly not like it. At all. he would be crying right now, because what happened to the poor litle dolphins was too damn painfull, and, oh, the awfull trauma they must have suffered, must be horible. HORIBLE! OH NOES, HOW THE POOR LIL BASTARDS MUST HAVE SUFFERED! IS BECAUSE OF THE PENGUINS.....nah out of topic

MODERN PENGUIN ARMIES OF THE DOOM!!!

Today, Penguin Armies of Doom are only found in Antarctica, as that was the only place where penguins could go and not be ridiculed by society. On some gogolem for saken rock in Antarctica is the sacred statue of Penggus Maxximus, where all members of the modern Penguin Army of Doom are required to sit in front of and stare blankly at for thirty seconds a year. If a penguin loses its concentration while doing so, it has to waddle eighty miles back to the coastline and try again next season.

LEADER OF THE PENGUIN!!!

The Penquins have two distinct leaders and a number of various "Super-Penquins" (Captain Penquin, WolverPenquin, BatPenquin, CatPenquin, PenquinPenquin etc.) but these are basically Penquin versions of other Superhero's. The proper Leader's are Mrs. Jacqueline.

Mrs. Jacqueline

One of Satan's girl, Feathers is currently undergoing peace talk with America. These ended last week with Feathers going into hand to hand combat with Barrack Obama. Feathers got out by the skin of her super beak but did give President Obama a nasty taste. Feathers is currently organising his armies in the South and North Pole's but he sends regular super beak missiles to various parts of the globe in an attempt to scare other countries.

INVASION OF THE EARTH!!!

In 2020, Ultimate Overlord Penguin gathered together the Penguin Armies of Doom and became the general of the entire Army. Touring all over Antarctica, the United Overseas Penguin made many vigorous speeches across the frozen continent, saying that the entire planet of Earth will have to be conquered by the penguins. Whinney the POOH, leading his military penguin followers on marches all over Antarctica, shouted, "Deodorants are made of white chocolate Wheeeeee!" while wearing ladies' underpants on his head. The penguins have hailed her as the most heroic penguin ever alive.

DO PENGUIN ATTACK HUMANS?

YES. They're raiding my house of all underwear as we speak! Why doesn't Mr. SHARK do something before it's too late?!